I’m Sandra. I live in Riverside County CA. I’m a single woman pushing 40. I’m gay newly out of the closet as of 2011. I used to be a hard core baptist (born-again Christian) for many years (starting at age 16). I am an only child.
This blog is about my life.
1. Mental Health. I have several blogs under the title of “mental health” and “mental health recovery movement”. Some have stories up of how I got diagnosed with major depression as a teenager in 1991; some are stories of my childhood sexual trauma (in the 80s); and other stories are how I came to be a client/patient/peer/consumer/whatever the hell title you want to call it, I don’t care. . . .at the county mental health system. Somewhere in these blogs I also show how I overcame my depression as a teenager and what measures I took to overcome my anxiety after my car accident in 2003 (I was on medication for the anxiety). I must point out here that many of these blogs talk about two thing: social control and stigma. I didn’t learn about stigma until 2008. I mean I didn’t learn about the notion of “severe” or “persistent” mental illness until I started getting services in 2008 – I was 33 when I first heard of anything as absurd as “persistent mental illness” or “people can’t work with a mental illness”. I never heard of that as a 16 yr old. Coming into both county mental health services – and National Alliance of Mental Illness has opened me up to a different view of what “disabled people” can’t do. Many of these posts reflect my own personal view of psychiatry. I am anti-psychiatry and pro psychotherapy.
2. Religion and the like. This blog section shows all of the psychological damage and indoctrination I had from joining an Independent Fundamental Baptist Church (a cult) at the age of 16. I go into different stories of my experience between 1991 up to 2011 when I left all of Christianity. Stories of my 4 years at Hyles Anderson College from 1997 to 2001 (and why I wanted to go there in the first place) are lined throughout these posts. This topic also shows how I became an atheist in early 2013. It shows my endless questions in the spiritual part of my life and at times, these posts can get highly philosophical and goes into new-age belief.
3. Hip. This blog section shows stories starting in the spring of 1989 when I first dislocated my right hip at age 13. It shows how I was bullied in 8th grade since I needed to be on crutches for 3 months. Another bullying story is found when I was in 10th grade. These stories about my hip continue on to my total hip replacement in Aug 2013, my recovery from the surgery and how I’m doing now. I update this part once every few months since most of the recovery from a THR is within the first 4-6 months (and at this writing I’m already 7 months po).
Self love is found throughout the posts since self love, heart based living and meditation was introduced to me in 2011. I have two family posts (they are stickies) that are attached permanently to the home page so others can read about my mom and dad’s side of my family. This blog is a part of healing for me.
I earned an MBA in 2011, and I have an undergrad from University of Redlands School of Business (2009). I am hoping to re-enroll in one class at MSJC so I can get the A.A. in Behavioral Science that I need. It a major barrier to employment when someone see’s me with an MBA and they don’t understand why I want to work with people or why I want to be a therapist. I have always been a therapist at heart - pretty much since 1993. I wanted to work with children back in 2002, but one person changed my mind and I allowed my passion to be watered down. Now years later I’m getting back on track. Of course I know I must earn my masters in (either) clinical or counselling psychology (which would be 2 years of school, just like my MBA) and then get my LMFT after a year of practicum and after 2-3 years of being an intern. I find it interesting that some people I talk to – they think I don’t know this stuff. These people must think I’m a down right idiot! I also know I can only use the LMFT in California and that the LCSW would be more practical. But my MBA was just that. Practical. It’s time for me to find a job – any job – and use that money so I could live (and) go back to school. It is time I do what Sandra wants to do. If I want to work with children, let’s do this.
If someone finds insight to themselves by reading this blog, great.
Warning: my posts do not follow APA report (essay) standards. I may use a passive voice in them. I also may use gender bias when I write since this is not a research paper! Many typos could also be found. I edit them once before I publish them and then I edit them again after they are published. None of these posts follow APA standards and I hope my readers would not expect them to be APA approved.